Several days ago I received a letter from a young man by the name of Jake.* He
was boasting to me about his big collection of serial killer cards
and his fascination with such individuals.
Jake said that he reads a lot of
books and loves to watch movies about serial killers, and the he
has amassed many facts about them from the internet.
My heart was heavy as I read his
letter. He's obviously deluded
by the media’s portrayals of those who commit these kinds
of crimes.
I seldom get letters like Jake's. But on occasion people like
him do write to ask questions or to express their fascination with this subject.
Usually I never reply.
With this man, though, I did.
I tried to explain to Jake that hurting
another person is a horrible thing.
It's not exciting or fun. Rather it is sick and evil.
It's a nightmare with lots of grief
and pain, I said to him, not only for the families of the victims,
but for the ones doing the harm.
Jake needed to know, too, that I
have a tremendous amount of sorrow for what I did at a time when
my own life was out of control.
That I had no right to take peoples' lives, and how I would do anything if I could undo it.
To me this man appears to be living
in a Hollywood-type fantasy world in which killing someone is portrayed
as being of no big deal, and that’s cool. I believe that when someone watches certain crime shows on television or in the movies, it is easy to get a false impression.
I tried
to bust through Jake’s
immature and absurd ideas by telling him that inmates basically
lead broken and defeated lives. We struggle to survive, and we must endure the day-to-day
monotony of prison life.
I explained to Jake that being locked
up is hard. That I myself
have nearly twenty-eight years of confinement, and I have to live
in a cage like an animal.
He needed to be told to look beyond
his fascination with mass murderers and face reality.
I was firm with Jake, but I was kind. I hope I was able to help
him to see that his present views are foolish.
David Berkowitz
April 16, 2005